Stuck!

Uggghhh. . . . . .I finally started another post and word stopped working and lost what I already typed up.  Lately I have been stuck when it comes to blogging.  I have started several over the last few weeks concerning things going on in my life right now but they didn’t get finished because was worried about how they would come across and the one or three people who read this would wonder what my problem was/is. 

I am still looking for a job.  This is very stressful.  I feel that teaching is what I am supposed to do but it just isn’t happening.  We are to the point that I am going to have to find something non teaching related and that breaks my heart.  I do not want to get stuck in another job doing what I don’t love but for financial reasons I am going to have to.   I am 40+; I should be doing what I love not working just for a paycheck (at least that is how I feel about it).

Family. . . .I love my family with all my heart but things have changed since my Mom passed away.  I thought my sisters and I would be closer but it hasn’t turned out that way.  I don’t know what to do about it.  I think for a while for my own sake, I am going to take a step back from things and be there is they need me but not try to do or be anything else.  That may sound mean but I am really struggling with some very hurt feelings. 

I can’t believe that we are already ½ way through September.  I have not done anything Christmas gift wise and getting some sort of job will determine if we will be Mr. & Mrs. Scrooge this year.  I already told my nephew that he needed to start praying that I find a job if he wants a present!!!  My birthday is in less than a month and my Gmom P’s 90^th birthday is a month from today.  Last weekend we celebrated my Gmom W’s 89^th birthday.  It was so nice to see family that we don’t get to see very often.

Yesterday was a huge football game in our part of the world.  We have a combined population (between the sister cities we live in) of 175,000 folks (I do not know if that even includes the huge # of students attending TAMU and Blinn Jr. College) and this weekend we had an additional estimated (before this weekend) 75,000 of our closest friends and relatives visiting.  Oh my goodness.  It was crowded everywhere you went.  We did not go to town except for early dinner Friday evening, to DQ and the bank during the game and to church and lunch today.  Needless to say the outcome wasn’t what we had hoped for but we did make a good comeback at the end of the game.  Like him or not, Johnny Manziel is talented and we have some other outstanding players so they made for an exciting game!!!  Now everyone can go back home so we can have a few days of “quiet” before we play SMU here at home.

Well, I hope I haven’t put you to sleep or whined too much.  Just got a lot going on and am finding it hard to express my feelings.  Have a great week.